Enough about me, I want to tell you about my bear. I have one stuffed animal. Embarrassing, but I received it in my adulthood and so it has just stuck around. It is a small, blue carebear with sleepy eyes. I suppose it is "Sleepy Care" if there is such a bear. He tends to reside in our bed and Connor has feigned rivalry with it since the minute they met. I never named it so Connor did. The bear's name is now Sleepy Fuck Bear. Lovely. Con is constantly hucking the defenseless little thing across the room and once I walked out of the shower to find the bear dangling from the curtain rod - hung by my laptop cord around its neck.
Last week, I was working and Con was in bed by the time I got home. His one arm stretched across the bed and in his hand was Sleepy Fuck. At the time I thought it was adorable. In the morning, Connor got up early(ish) for work and I said to him, "I knew you secretly loved the bear, you fell asleep with him last night". Connor said, "Oh".
I tell you, this "oh" is not a good sound.
I sat up and looked at him and said, "What?" He handed me the bear. On Sleepy Fuck's forehead in RED MARKER was a perfect upside-down crucifix. Apparently Connor had gotten intoxicated that night and thought it was a hilarious prank. Immediately after executing his hilarious prank, he thought it might have been a bad idea.
Luckily, the marker washed off completely so it was a hilarious prank in the end.
I didn't get a photo of the original crime against cuteness because Connor rubbed stain remover onto Sleepy Fuck's forehead pretty much immediately so this picture doesn't truly do it justice, hopefully you'll get the gist.